Superdog!!!!

So after a horrendous trip to the dentist today–THREE cavities (I’ve never had one in my life, then I get THREE?!?!? I think the hygienist is lying)

But I digress. Mae is working late so I decided to go hang with Atticus for a little while. After the best 11 minute ab workout on earth–Slim in 6, kicks my ass every time–Atticus and I head out for a walk. I figured I would get crazy and walk with the pup to a nearby park. We usually just walk around Mae’s complex a few times so this was big stuff for Atticus.

We set off. Mae lives on a main road so we are walking on a tiny little sidewalk with SVU’s whizzing by, causing me to have minor strokes every time the dog moves for fear he will dart into oncoming traffic.

Just as we walk out of death alley and onto a slightly larger stretch of sidewalk a old, crazy white man clad in only a wife beater and pants 17 sizes too big who is surely a clan member starts yelling obscenities at me. Well my fantastic super-dog Atticus AKA. Wolverine starts barking and growling at this old man (we’ll call him Forrest). I seriously thought my little 14.3 pound dog was going to hurdle the fence and rip Forrest’s Nazi flag tattoo right off his arm. Now Atticus loves strangers and always runs right to them. So for him to lose it on Forrest was a big deal. What a good dog! I think he’s a genius!

So we carry on walking to the park. With me picking the dog up and darting across the main road with visions of Frogger in my mind. I kept picturing those huge tractor trailers that flatten that little guy. We finally make it into the park and discover how much better this place is on foot than in a car. It’s called Ellington Agricultural Center, if you live in Nashville check out all the walking trails. After we explore a few trails and Atticus is dying of thirst (I didn’t bring him any water, yes I’m a bad dog owner) we find a river.

Atticus loved this river, he dug up things and ran like a crazy dog for about 40 minutes. I’ve never seen that lazy dog so excited. It was so cute. He and I were, sweaty, covered in mud and river water and I’m sure we looked like hobos or 12 year old kids after a long day.

Atticus was still so excited on the walk home that he practically ran. Since we had gone so slow on the way there I thought we would jog back. So as we are jogging Atticus decides he is going to dive headfirst into a stream that runs alongside the road. He completely immerses himself in the muddy water then leaps into my arms from fright. It looked to funny I collapsed on the side of the road in tears from laughter. So at this points we are sweaty, covered in mud, river water AND grass, out of breathe, and crying with laughter. 

We finally make it home. I know Mae will be seriously irate if she comes home to a nasty, wet, smelly dog. So I know the only option is to bath this poor exhausted creature. I wrestle him into the tub and proceed to get even more wet and stinky (is that possible at this point??) bathing him. I feed the poor animal and he practically kissed me for putting him back in his crate. I am sure he is FAST asleep as I type.

I then get into my car and immediately realize that I am that smell. It’s never good when you can smell yourself! After a freezing cold shower I am thouroughly exhausted and happy. 

What a Nashville day!!!!  

 

Ed. Note- Sorry guys I had video’s but I can’t figure it out just now!

Summer Love

It feels like I haven’t posted in forever! I’ve been so blissfully happy I can’t seem to think of any sarcastic comments or make fun of people. I don’t even recognize myself!! And I didn’t want to post some sappy crap that would make everyone throw up in their mouths and delete me from their blog roll, so that left me nothing!

It’s summer in Nashville, and aside from the fact that I can’t see and/or breathe its incredible!! So here’s my list of wonderful summer Nashville things!!

• Movies in the Park. Picture Jennifer Lopez and Matthew McConaughey in Wedding Planner but better..and real. And the icing on the cake, they are playing Dirty Dancing. Yeah I’m crazy for Swayze, I said it. Don’t act like you never wanted to carry a watermelon.

 

•  Canoeing! Yeah it’s the Harpeth and yeah its like a big bath but I love it! Even when Tipp makes me row us all by myself! Watch out for the cows!!!

 

• A tan! Summer means I get to look healthy and not like a little Indian kid with jaundice and huge circles under her eyes! and NO MAKEUP! I’ll be damned if I’m wearing makeup in 145 degree weather with 200% humidity..deal with it! I’m going with the theory that a tan makes you look ten pounds skinnier..now if they are right about looking ten pounds skinnier if you stand up straight, I’m at my goal weight!! How do you like that weight watchers!

 

• We won’t have 25 kids in each gymnastics class I teach on the bus! And since the kids can go outside all day it’s not a melee when they get to come out to us! Downside, sweaty little bodies that just want to loll all over you. One more upside, when it gets really hot they just want to lie down. Maybe I should just put the heaters on year round?

 

• Dancing in the Park. A huge band playing swing, latin or Jazz music. And tons of people dancing like professionals at sunset! Who am I kidding, I’ll never have the balls to go out there! I look like Elaine when I dance. NOT cute! Maybe I’ll go watch..

 

 

Deep Thoughts

• Why does everyone seem to have a crazy neighbor? Mae’s neighbors are definitely loons. Talking on the phone outside, tatted, crazy hysterical dog, out all night..I say strippers, Mae says Christian musicians

 

• Have you ever seen the loony tunes when Bugs Bunny dresses up like a women gladiator and rides that crazy horse with the skinny legs in order to entice Elmer Fudd and it works?? You so lovely, my broomhilda…HILARIOUS

 

• I wish they would get internet on planes, 18 hours would fly by if I could look up random gorilla facts or which celebrity married who. OR I could play Scrabble!! I’m excited just thinking about it!!

 

• Why do people think monkeys are so cute? Is it the disgusting beady eyes, horrific stench, crazy high pitched squeal sound they make? Or is it the fact that they are the root of pretty much every disease in the world?? NOT CUTE!

 

• I wonder who came up with the idea to do some really dangerous things, and who tried it out first. Like swimming with sharks, jumping out of planes, diving over waterfalls in a barrel? Seriously when did that sound like a good idea??

 

• If you were Hilary Clinton would you just give in before the race was over, for the sake of “the party”?? NO! Does she seem like she gives a shit about the good of “the party”…I think I’m going to start using the phrase “the party”..from now on my friends are “the party”

 

• I love using inverted commas when I speak..

 

 

 

Grey’s Is Back Baby!!

Guys I never thought it would happen! Grey’s Anatomy is BACK!! I’m so happy I have no words…ok we all know that isn’t true. I have plenty of words, if you don’t want the show majorly ruined I would stop reading right now cause I am about the spoil the shit out of it!

Ok so I am SO happy that this whole Izzy/George cheating whores, bad sex debacle is over! That was just stupid. I mean like Izzy, who could have anyone and HELLO had Denny would

A. Hookup (sidenote: my mom used the phrase hooked up tonight. HA!) with George

 B. Sleep with a married man. Meredith and Addison play cheating whore way better.

I actually teared up this week when George and Izzy were talking in the hallway and he said he always looks around to see if she thought the same thing was funny like he did. GUYS, be BEST FRIENDS again! I understand they need to get there and all that but damn they are so good. What the hell were you thinking Shonda, hooking them up?? BAD CALL! Especially after you made us fall hook line and sinker in love with Denny. (Who by the way I still love, and seriously ugly cry every time I even THINK about that dying scene or hear the Chasing Cars song. Here see for yourself (you are dead on the inside if you don’t cry)

Damn I watched it. Hold on while I compose myself. Who am I kidding, this could take awhile. Talk amongst yourselves.

Now moving on the Christina, I love her, always have always will. She is awesome. I love tonight that she had to practice talking “girl”. I totally relate to that, I can’t talk ”girl” either.  She never really annoyed me, just the fact that Burke LEFT her at the altar. SERIOUSLY, after all that shit, and HELLO asshole she didn’t even want a wedding! Maybe if Isaiah Washington could keep his damn mouth shut they could have kept the character. I will admit there is a hole in the show without Preston. I love how today Christina said to Hahn, “Is it because I’m Asian?” bahahah..yeah kid its a race thing, Hahn is just in love with the most overtly ethnic person on the show, Callie.

And about Callie, I like her so much more now that she is not simperingly in love with George (seriously George?!?!?). I wish she had punched Izzy’s face in for cheating though. I think this whole Hahn is a lesbian thing is AWESOME! I laughed out loud tonight when Callie asked Meredith and Christina if anyone thought they were Lesbians and Meredith says “No cause we are whores who drink tequila and sleep with boys” (this isn’t he exact quote I couldn’t find it). HILARIOUS, cause they ARE drunken whores and I love that they know it!

Sloan thinking and saying he is God is awesome. And his face when he saw Derek, Meredith, Addison and Rose in the elevator was too good. Another laugh out loud moment. I wish he would have said “I had him first girls!”. Derek is totally his heterosexual life partner.

I love love love that Meredith is in therapy, DAMN if anyone needs it, it is that girl. She and Lexie should get a discount rate to deal with all their family shit. Now work Mer out and make her propose to Derek! And let them be HAPPY for five freaking minutes!

And how about Rebecca’s lying tramp ass. Pregnant, WHATEVER! Believe me girl Alex is not the type to be trapped. It won’t be pretty.

Thank God Grey’s is BACK! I never thought they could right all the amazing wrongs of last season, I really thought I would hate it forever for ruining all my favorite characters! I’m not going to lie i wrote a letter to Shonda after that shithole season finale of last year. I like to think she listened.

I’m Home!!!

I’m back! Sorry to have been AWOL for awhile guys. I have been so busy with the pup, the school, and I was in Austin for the week. BUT I’m finally home THANK GOD!

I’ve always been a traveler. Leaving for days, months even a year at times inspired nothing but sheer excitement and glee! Well,  I don’t know if I’m getting old, settled or what; but I was not excited to leave. I was worried about the dog, leaving Mae to care for him herself and I just plain didn’t want to go. I’m happy here, I have my little routine and I guess I’m stuck in it.

I got to Austin and was confronted with some really really great informative (I was at a work conference) people, some not so friendly people, and some downright mean people. This was three days of makeup (which I never wear), high heels (ditto), meetings, information, information, information. The conference part was great. All the information and these people really know how to revive and regenerate you!

This is the seriously abbreviated version of the events of this trip. I will just say this, I am extremely grateful for my friends and family. I think that people take seeing a friendly face and knowing that someone loves you for granted too much. This trip was exhausting.

So since I was reminded how great friends are I am going to thank some of mine!

Firstly, my business partner. She is not only a great business partner, she is a great employer, friend and an downright good person. I know all this because in addition to being my business partner she has been my boss for 5 years and my friend for longer. She conducts herself in a honest, upbeat manner and is truly grateful for everything in her life. This is not very common, she is happy to be alive each and every day. I could not have asked for a better partner. She is everything I am not and (I hope) vice versa. She is able to rise above and see the good when I am mired down in anger and resentment. She has great ideas every day and I can’t wait to implement some of them!!

I am also so happy to have Mae as my friend. Mae is always there for me and has been since I have known her. She takes a genuine interest in my life (let’s be honest, it’s not that interesting!!). and is always there to take my side. A lot of the time, side taking is underated. Sometimes all you need is someone (right or wrong) to be just as mad as you are whether you are justified or not. We are so alike, we have a code, sometimes we don’t even say a word and can fall on the floor laughing at the exact same thing. Isn’t that the best!!

Tipp is next. She is my (and all her friends) biggest champion. I know I can call her at any time of the day and no matter what she will be there in a heartbeat. If you follow her blog you know she just took in a pregnant cat (she already has two dogs, one of which is a rescue–she ran on the interstate to save her–but that’s a WHOLE other story) because she could not stand to see the cat harmed. Tipp goes out of her way on a daily basis for anyone in need, especially her friends. Tipp is someone who I look to for guidance, a kind of a moral compass.

J is also on this list. I wish I saw her more! J always lend a listening ear and helps in any way she can. And with everything going on in her life that is HUGE!! J is an amazing sister, daughter and wife. She puts herself after everyone in her family on a daily basis. I could not be happier to include her in my list.

I’m including Mrs. Lilac in this. She is a new friend but nonetheless a great one. I met her beautiful, smart daughter and adorable sons today. She is so lucky! Her daughter is now my dogs surrogate mommy and best friend. Mrs. Lilac is smart and giving. She was the catalyst in rescuing Cinderella (the pregnant Kitty). If you have not read Mrs. Lilac’s blog about teaching her children to value and protect all life you should! Mrs. Lilac always has a sunny disposition and positive attitude. Not to mention Mae and I are constantly amazed that she knows as much useless celebrity info as we do!

 

So after my ridiculous week I am so glad to have these people as well as my incredible family (including Atticus!) to come home to! It’s nice to know not everyone is plotting your demise!!

 

I love you guys!!!

 

Sidenote, Atticus is FINALLY making some headway on the potty training (after Mae found his “toilet” aka behind her couch! YUCK!)

I’ve Been Robbed!!

Jake Gyllenhaal STOLE our dog’s name! His German Shepard mix is named Atticus Finch!!

I am convinced he stole it from us. I mean come on who else would be so creative!?!?!?!?

Greed

I just read a great post on emotional thinkers and rational thinkers. I am definitely the latter. I am a rational thinker, I do not understand people who act in haste or do things they know are wrong because they can not control their emotions. I have never played the break up/make up game and do not tolerate toxic friends. Yes this might make me a bitch. I get that, however, my friends and family know they can %110 count on me at any time. And I know the same. I also can not understand manipulative, jealous or greedy people.

I would say I’m honest to a fault. This is not necessarily a good trait. I am very blunt and sometime need to sensor myself a little bit more. All through school that was my teachers biggest complaint,  “She doesn’t think before she speaks”. I still have that problem. I can’t take a liar, lies or talking behind people’s backs.

This brings me to the point of this post. Why do people feel that they have to be nice when they clearly do not like you? If you ask me just nod hello to me and move on. Or let’s have it out and then get over it. I see people every day going out of their way to be negative and cut others down. At this point in my life I am mired down with these sorts of people. Greedy, Jealous, Manipulative, just plain Ugly. It is very hard for me to bite my tongue when people are attempting to affect my life or hurting my friends. I am learning. Slowly. It’s hard.

I am choosing to look at the positive. I am learning so much in my daily life about what not to be. I know exactly how I want to treat people and the things I will not stand for. I am hoping I will be able to keep my idealistic view of right and wrong. I know I will be shocked at the “real world” but am hoping I will be able to conduct myself in a manner that allows me to sleep soundly at night knowing I have done my best.

I think everyone should remember the old adage “Honesty is the best policy”.  And another one I’m sure you’ve all heard “Treat others as you wish to be treated”.  How far we have come from this.

Atticus’ Arrival!!

Its Atticus Comes Home Day!!! Yippee!!!

 

I love….

• I took this from Tipp who took it from Michelle. What a fantastic idea! Here’s the rules

“Make your own list or leave a love of yours in the comments. The only catch? You can’t include a single person you know on your list. No ‘I love the way my husband laughs’ or ‘I love hearing my little girl call for me’.”

“This particular little exercise is about stripping away everyone who defines you and figuring out what you (not his partner; not their mother/daughter/sister/friend) love.”

Great idea guys!

• I love falling into bed at the end of a really crazy day and watching reality TV for hours.

 

• I love waking up in a new bed in a new country every week.

 

• I love coming home after being away for a long long time.

 

• I love going to somewhere new after you’ve been home for a long time

 

• I love unplanned nights that turn out to be the best stories!

 

• I love going to the gym BEFORE work!

 

• I love movies that make you ugly cry.

 

• I love reading a fantastic book all night long because I can’t bear to not know how it ends.

 

• I love taking things into my own hands and doing it faster, better and more efficiently.

 

• I love Wikipedia and IMDB.

 

• I love laughing so hard I really think I might throw up or pee in my pants. or both 

 

• I love soap opera montages.

 

•  I love coke zero. A lot.

 

• I love surprise endings

 

• I love crossing off everything on my to-do list for that day.

 

• I love cake.

 

• I love speaking in fake accents

 

• I love laughing until I cry

 

• I love MY LIFE!!! (Sorry to steal Tipp, couldn’t resist!)

 

 

Slightly Dog Obsessed

Guess what this post is on..Dogs! Surprised? I might be a scoche dog obsessed right now! Its been about ummm lets see, we moved here in ‘85, so 23 years since I’ve owned a dog. I’m entitled!

Ok Mae and I were talking about dog names tonight and we found the PERFECT one. I can’t wait to share. Mrs. Lilac and Tipp will definitely get the meaning, lets see who else will!  

First, you have to know the options we went through, because they are pretty damn funny.

Mid-last week we decided we were naming our dog a ghetto rapper name

Ludacris

Lil Kim

Snoop

Fat Joe

 

Then today after we met cutie cuterson we thought about using

Guiseppi (my sister would have cried with laughter at this one)

Arturo (think overboard…Katarina! Arturo!)

Meatpie (that was my brother)

 

Still later today we decided we were going to use some obscure Beatles reference

Gideon

Rocky

 

Nothing was right!!! Then I thought of it! I looked up Mae’s favorite book (I’m not going to tell you what it is because I want to see how many recognize the name)..and we picked the PERFECT name

 

ATTICUS FINCH

 

 

Isn’t that cute! You get a prize if you read that entire post! And another prize if you know the book! Unfortunately the prize is listening to me yammer about this dog some more!  

Tipp, I might be rivaling you for dog posts…

Mae, there you go..it’s sealed in cement..or binary code…LOVE YOU!! Thank you so much, I couldn’t ask for a better friend!