Summer Love

It feels like I haven’t posted in forever! I’ve been so blissfully happy I can’t seem to think of any sarcastic comments or make fun of people. I don’t even recognize myself!! And I didn’t want to post some sappy crap that would make everyone throw up in their mouths and delete me from their blog roll, so that left me nothing!

It’s summer in Nashville, and aside from the fact that I can’t see and/or breathe its incredible!! So here’s my list of wonderful summer Nashville things!!

• Movies in the Park. Picture Jennifer Lopez and Matthew McConaughey in Wedding Planner but better..and real. And the icing on the cake, they are playing Dirty Dancing. Yeah I’m crazy for Swayze, I said it. Don’t act like you never wanted to carry a watermelon.

 

•  Canoeing! Yeah it’s the Harpeth and yeah its like a big bath but I love it! Even when Tipp makes me row us all by myself! Watch out for the cows!!!

 

• A tan! Summer means I get to look healthy and not like a little Indian kid with jaundice and huge circles under her eyes! and NO MAKEUP! I’ll be damned if I’m wearing makeup in 145 degree weather with 200% humidity..deal with it! I’m going with the theory that a tan makes you look ten pounds skinnier..now if they are right about looking ten pounds skinnier if you stand up straight, I’m at my goal weight!! How do you like that weight watchers!

 

• We won’t have 25 kids in each gymnastics class I teach on the bus! And since the kids can go outside all day it’s not a melee when they get to come out to us! Downside, sweaty little bodies that just want to loll all over you. One more upside, when it gets really hot they just want to lie down. Maybe I should just put the heaters on year round?

 

• Dancing in the Park. A huge band playing swing, latin or Jazz music. And tons of people dancing like professionals at sunset! Who am I kidding, I’ll never have the balls to go out there! I look like Elaine when I dance. NOT cute! Maybe I’ll go watch..

 

 

Deep Thoughts

 

“The crows seemed to be calling his name thought Caw”

 

Here are some random thoughts I had.

 

• Is there such a thing as movie love? I’m talking Allie and Noah, wait twelve years for you, arguments, uproarious laughter, kids, seeing each other through Alzheimer’s, dying in the same bed because you can’t stand to be apart, you’re a bird I’m a bird kind of love. And if there isn’t; then Nicholas Sparks is an asshole for giving us hope.

 

• Why do 110 pound women who can eat whole pizzas, drink Mexican cheese dip, and chug 2 liters of Mountain Dew complain about not being “toned”?  Bite me bitch!

 

• Why do some people hate Al Gore with a fiery passion? Even if his entire theory is absolute crap (I don’t think it is) what is he really doing wrong? Telling people to recycle and not pollute? Is that really so bad? Even if there is not global warming would it be so terrible to live in a clean place, and to have celebrities donate some of their millions to a good cause? I don’t think so.

 

• Why don’t I have the force?…. Or do I?

 

• Who started calling an indicator a blinker? It’s like calling a car a vroom vroom..STUPID!

 

• What makes British accents so damn sexy (i.e. Colin Firth, Daniel Day Lewis, Ewan McGregor)?

 

• Why do people say it is easier to work with adults than children? Kids hug you and tell you they love you every day, and when they annoy me I can put them in time out. Name me someone who can do that to adults…and not get sued?

 

• Is it a good idea to let the leader of a country pardon himself? For that matter, is it a good idea to have a felon run a country? I guess we’ll find out in the next South African election.

 

• Why is it that cheese dip and/or new shoes can cure any kind of hurt?

 

• Why would I still choose Mr. Big over Aidan?

Things I love about Spring

1. I can wear my dresses sans tights. Which means I don’t have to go to the bathroom every five minutes and yank them up so I can walk like a human and not a penguin.

2. NEW SHOES!! I already bought three new pairs of sandals..I have a problem.

3. Being able to show of my brand new foot tattoo in said sandals. It’s three stars..if anyone asks it’s for my siblings but really I surfed the internet until I found a design I liked.

4. Being Tan. Lebanese people should NEVER be pale. It’s not cute. Think jaundice.

5. Not having to freeze my ass off at work. I work on a school bus, no air or heat. We alternately freeze and boil all year long. I pick hot over cold any day!

6. Cloudy Ass Canoe Trip Part 4.

7. It’s that much closer to Tipp and I’s fantastic birthday celebrations! And we can start talking plans! We do birthday’s right baby!

8. Florida Family Vacation. Best time ever.

9. My house will not be sub-artic and I might be able to pack the parka away.